Tone Down the Boudoir Shots. You say you want a good guy who respects you as a human being and is interested in having a serious relationship on you, and then you post photos of yourself next to your bed (or on your own bed, or in your bed, or in someone else's bed). And if you're not posting pictures of yourself next to your bed, (or on your bed, or in your bed), you're posting photographs with far too much cleavage. Now, that is absolutely wonderful - I don't have any problem at all with this, and I'm sure many men don't have a problem either - but what some men do have a problem with is when women place said super-sexy glamor pictures and then complain to their buddies, or make statements on their profiles about how all men are dogs and just want them for sex. And while we're on the subject of complaint-filled profiles... Local cougars near me Narre Warren Victoria.
Athletic and Toned Means, well, Athletic and Toned. I despise the body descriptors as much as you do (well, except for you size 0 women out there, you almost certainly adore them), but I do think it's significant that we at least strive for truthfulness. The word on the street is the fact that far too many women out there in the internet dating world are using the "fit and toned" descriptor in reference to their "about average" bodies (this criticism applies to guys also, of course). The matter is, there actually isn't anything wrong with having an about typical (or curvy) body thus let's take the pressure off ourselves and heed the guidance of Amy Schuler, and understand once and for all that a little meat on our bones isn't going to kill us, and it isn't going to drive away the good guys either (right, good guys?).
No. More. Instagram. Photographs. I love Instagram photographs because lots of the filters make my eyes seem strikingly blue (or green, or lavender), and some even shave about 10 years off my face. But do I post these photos on my online dating profile? No I do not. Why? Because my eyes are not actually that blue (or green or lavender), and I am about 10 years older than my Instagram photographs would have you believe. This was the number one criticism among the guys I interviewed - artistically filtered (i.e., delusory) photos. Truth in advertising women, truth in marketing.
Manner too Many Pet Photographs. This was a tremendous complaint among the men I interviewed. They are taking a look at your profile to learn more about you, not your pets. So delete the pet photos, particularly the ones without you in them. Oh and while we are on the topic of pet photographs, I got a personal request of all you single, middle aged women out there on dating websites: please, please, please delete any and all photos of your cats. This really is so significant. I can not stress it enough. Single, middle aged women already must deal with much too many negative stereotypes, along with the cat pictures (you cuddling with your cats, you kissing your cats, multiple cats in your bed) merely function to fortify them. I once composed a blog post about how dating sometimes made me feel undesirable , and I got hundreds of opinions from single middle-aged men throughout all of North America informing me that I must live in a dark apartment with 100 or so cats, so actually, please delete them.
Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I'd focus on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am much more comfortable with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this particular post. Victoria local cougars. The following list is my best attempt at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with some of my own observations predicated on a bit of research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you are a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Local Cougars Near Me Brunswick Victoria. Anyway, here goes:
I can't say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, period. Narre Warren, Victoria local cougars. Seeing a guy standing next to an open bathroom, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you are doing something enjoyable (like fishing or watching football). Or, should you not have a selfie stick, shoot your profile photograph the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your auto. Worst comes to worst, have a friend take an action shot of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. Should you not have a single friend who can shoot your photograph, or you do not possess a smartphone, then you probably should not be dating in the first place.
I am not the single one detecting these tendencies. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the issue of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with some of these men since I sensed they were really nice guys. And let's just say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of seldom receiving e-mails from women, of their emails regularly going unanswered. I wanted to catch these men by their shoulders, and provide them a robust (albeit friendly) handshake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant advertising techniques. But I've consistently resisted the temptation to do so out of a fear of seeming rude and ill-mannered.
Narre Warren, VIC Local Cougars. Many of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising narrative or a couple gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can be a great source of amusement, particularly if wine is included. But what I find somewhat troubling are some rather disturbing trends I Have noticed in many men's profiles who appear to be quite ordinary otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating newcomers, jumping back in the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain extent, uncertain of what the other sex is searching for, or the best way to get their focus. Local Cougars near me Narre Warren. However, these gaffes are so obvious that I think that it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?
I have been a member of a popular online dating service for a little over a year now, and I need to say that, overall, I'm happily surprised by the characteristic of guys I've met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain hopeful that eventually, I will. Local Cougars near me Narre Warren. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I've encounter a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-guys-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who thought that choosing the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that definitely howled "locked residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep urge to meet a woman with young children (preferably lads). One of my all-time favorites though was the man who spent half his profile story writing about how he was still intensely in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was forced to find love online (yay us!).
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